Kathryn's Blog: Fan Letters

Love notes to me

Everybody has got to love love notes, and I am no exception.  Here’s one I got from a client recently—I had just finished a draft of a new profile essay for her, and you can see here that it fit perfectly.  If your profile could use work, it’s the most popular service I offer.  Here’s how to set your profile review up: Click here!

Hi Kathryn!

This is so EXCITING!  I love it!!!

OMG - seeing the DANCE PART in print makes me realize that I’m “talking the talk” - so I better hurry up and take some lessons so I can “walk the walk”!!!

It’s very Upbeat and extroverted - just like “me"… I’m going to look it over more carefully over the weekend - but I think it sounds great!

Many Thanks, Kathryn…

Have a great weekend!

Emily

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Getting Married!

I got this wonderful note in my email box the other day.  What great news, and thanks for giving me some credit, Mary Jane!

I contacted you not to long ago; and, it was right after that I meant my soon to be Husband.

You have been a great inspiration; and, I want to thank you.

I will be getting married on May 18, 2007, to a wonderful man that I knew from high school; and, our paths have crossed many, many times.
We have been together for 8 months; and, when we get married we will be just 3 days from being together for a year. Thanks again.
Sincerely, Mary Jane Zeh

Congratulations!

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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Kathryn’s on Yahoo!

Did you know that I write for Yahoo! Personals?  Every few weeks or so, a link one of my articles is posted on the front page of Yahoo!, and watch out! Visits to my website go up times ten or more, I get stacks of emails from singles asking for coaching and advice, and new readers join the mailing list of my enewsletter *eMAIL to eMATE* (You aren’t a subscriber???  Sign up here.) It lasts for about a day, then it is back to the normal flow.  I can practically tell to the minute when my article goes off the board and the new stuff comes up. 

I was a Yahoo! star earlier this week ( Yahoo! featured), and right in the middle of all the emails came the following:

I just wanted to thank you for sharing your insight and knowledge in the dating arena. After reading your article on “Are you ready for a new relationship”, it helped me to understand more about myself, and what to present to my future significant other.

Thank you again for your contribution to this modern problem that many people face.

Sincerely,
John

Isn’t that wonderful?  That makes all my work worthwhile.

I also heard from one of my old therapy clients who now is single, found me via Yahoo!, and wants Romance Coaching.  And I heard from a Romance client from way back who is getting married.  Yahoo!

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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Feedback on My Article on Yahoo! Personals

I get letters from visitors to my website and readers of my enewsletter all the time.  When I think that the questions posed are of interest to more than the writer, I often alter the writer’s note to conceal identifying details, then publish the relevant content here or in my free *eMAIL to eMATE* enewsletter. (Not a subscriber? Sign up here!)

Kathryn:

Just read your piece on Yahoo personals and wanted to thank you for that.  I’ve had to
say “no” a few times since being back in the dating world, but when I finally found someone I was truly interested in, and she said “no” to furthering the relationship, it just killed me.  I ended up drinking beer all day the next day and being terribly depressed.  It hit me much harder that it should have, and I wish I’d read your article before it happened, because now I can see it wasn’t the end of the world after all, and being removed from it now, I can see we probably wouldn’t have been a good match anyway.  I’m only a tenth of the way through those hundred first dates, and feel very hopeful that I will find love before I get there.

Thanks again!  Jim

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We Love Fan Letters!

What a lovely letter dropped in my email box last week! Here’s an email from a reader named Sheila. We’ve never talked, I don’t think, but Sheila has obviously been reading my newsletter *eMAIL to eMATE* very carefully. Below is Sheila’s note, in its entirety, only slightly edited for readability. I underlined the last paragraph for good reason: Sheila makes a tremendously good point. And it’s good advice for men AND women.

I just want to seize this opportunity to support the sage advice in your newsletter.

Succinctly stated, I began dating (Mostly via online connections) in 2002, after 3 years of being “single again.” Being almost 50, I figured that life experience had given me some of those “weeding skills” which you mention. So, the conversations began.

Suffice it to say that I waded through a lot of nice (but not Him) guys as well as quite a few turkeys. By the time I discovered your newsletter in spring of 2004 I had pretty much decided that it would take a rare exception of a man for me to consider actually going out with a divorced fella. I hated coming to this conclusion, being divorced myself… it seemed rather unfair. But frankly, the only guys who seemed to possess any real relationship skills and maturity were the few widowers I had met along the way.

After a while, I began to despair of ever finding Mr. Right. A major ! move from a very rural area to an urban one kept me busy and totally uninterested in dating for a few months.

Then one day, voila, there in my Match.com mailbox appeared a letter from a nice, stable sounding widower who lived across town from me. At first, I didn’t respond to his mail… pondering if I even wanted to get back into dating. Then I asked myself “Why not?” After a year of dating, we are now a very happy and compatible couple.

My words of advice to women of all ages, were I asked, would be: “Stay away from the playboys, the desperately needy, the co-dependent.” No matter how charming they may be, no matter how strongly they appeal to your nurturing nature, do NOT get involved with them. They are NOT “happily ever after” material! They will never become what you want/need them to be. That old adage about people not changing for love definitely applies. If he is not already the kind of man you need and deserve!, then HE NEVER WILL BE!

And yes, take second (and third, fourth, etc...) looks at those guys who seem rather ordinary and nerdy. I have found that Mr Stability and Sanity is very often the most capable of thoughtfulness and tenderness as well.

Sincerely, Sheila

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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