Kathryn's Blog

The case for getting out on the dance floor

My client Leslie has been working her way through my book “Find a Sweetheart Soon!  Your Love Trip Planner for Women” and also my ecourse “Ten Days to Get Lucky at Love.”  She’s a great student and taking to it all like “a fish to water.”  After President Obama’s Inauguration, she emailed me the following – I liked her views so much that I asked if I could preprint it here so you could enjoy it too:

On page 16 of “Get Lucky at Love,” you write:

“BTW, women find men who can dance VERY attractive.  And a man willing to get out on the dance floor, despite not being perfect, can ask any woman there to dance.  And she will probably say ‘Yes.’”

Analytical student-type that I am, I’m looking everywhere for Love Luck and Bright Spots, and I found one in the coverage of the inaugural festivities.  What I saw really proves what you say about guys learning to dance—or even trying to dance.  Just a few weeks ago, I wouldn’t have seen this myself, so thanks a lot for that, too!

Everyone—absolutely everyone—is talking about the new President and First Lady and their first dance.  The recap on ABC opened and closed with footage from it.  They do look terrific; I think it’s the first time I’ve thought any of our American presidents actually looked romantic.  But here’s the thing.  President Obama isn’t doing anything all that complicated.  People are saying that they “glided” through a “slow, dignified two-step,” but it’s the same left-LEFT, right-RIGHT, three-two-one-spinnn that I remember from high school.

So lesson A: You do not have to know how to move like a professional to look awfully good.  You just have to look comfortable and into your partner.  People will think you’re attractive even if you’re the President.

Fewer people are talking about the new Vice President’s first dance, but he’s happy to say why.  He says he can’t dance.  He’ll tell anyone who will stand still long enough to listen. He freely admits stalling so that he won’t have to dance as long.  But here’s the thing.  The new VP DID dance in front of the assembled company, even if he didn’t think he was good at it.  And for double bonus points, he said he might not care much for dancing but he loved being close to his wife.

So lesson B: Willingness will get you almost as far as ability.  In some cases, it will get you even farther.

Now, there were doubtless tons of guys at the inaugural balls who couldn’t dance, told their dates they couldn’t dance and then punished themselves and their dates by refusing to dance.  I can’t say for sure because no one at all is talking about them.

Which leads us to lesson C: You only lose if you don’t play.

Dance-shy people take notice!

Talk to you Friday,



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