Kathryn's Blog: Over 50?

Facts About Boomer Singles

From a press release about LavaLifePrime—LavaLife’s new (and free for awhile) site for singles over 45:

A few interesting statistics on single Boomers:
* 30% of Boomers are single
* 70% of Boomers are internet savvy*
* 70% of single Boomers are dating regularly*
* Of those, 45% of men and 48% of women have sexual intercourse more than once per week*
* Only 14% of Boomer women and 22% of Boomer men are looking to get married or live with someone.* (For the younger groups these numbers are a significantly higher, ie. ages 30-39, 60%.) FULL ARTICLE @ PR LEAP

* AARP Study - American Association of Retired People

That’s SOME set of stats!  If you are a single “Boomer,” get out there and have some fun!

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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Cranky.com

I’m not sure how I feel about this site Cranky.com, but here goes.  It bills itself as “The first age-relevant search engine” and seems to be a sub-set of eons.com “50 plus everything” or “My Space for Boomers.”  I did think that the third most popular search “Romantic Weekend Getaways” was quite nice.  But though “cranky” is a cute domain name, for olderster???  Oh, Kathryn, get over it.

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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Match.com Makes News:Bits

1.  Match.com is changing its look —and from appearances, the kind of singles it is trying to recruit.  Style-wise, the site has gone black and white, with a little crisp nave blue, and added the cute motto “It’s okay to look!”  And they have also added a stylist to help with advice for profiles and presentation.  (Although that guy Jay Manuel looks very weird.  Is he made out of plastic?)  Looks to me like they are aiming at a higher end market.  The site now makes regular sites like Yahoo! Personals and especially true.com look pretty cheesy.  , for sure, to $34.95 for a month, $16.99 each if you sign up for six.  Still a bargain, when you think that even at full price, that’s just a little over a dollar a day for access to millions of singles.

2.  Then, in a bow to just how famous Match.com has become, The Washington Post published a piece on 1/28/2007 that is basically an angry rant about the plight of single women by an anonymous woman in her 30’s.  It’s sort of amazing that the Post would even publish an anonymous piece, let alone one that blames Match.com and other dating sites for her ills.

However, like most rants, there are grains of truth.  Granted, men (and women) have gotten spoiled by the seeming plethora of “hotties” of both genders.  Never mind that these folks practically never return emails.  Anonymous goes on to list her demands for dignity and respect, for all single women to to start “dignified dating behavior.”  Some of the list makes sense, like honesty, keeping in shape and not dressing provocatively.  But just as her anger reduces the effect of her message, some of her guidelines negate the rest.  Like “If you don’t receive flowers by the third date, dump him.”  Gosh.

Remember, the Internet and dating sites like Match.com are the medium, like a telephone.  Phones changed people’s lives, too.  We are in the middle of a big change period for dating and mating.  It feels like with Internet dating going mainstream (out of the shadows), we are now in a bit of the opposite extreme, of people going sort of wild with expectations, and then having massive disappointment.

3.  Then, practically on the same day as the Post piece (1/29/2007), the Wall Street Journal ran an article about Match.com and baby boomers.  Match. now has the largest number of paid subscribers among U. S. dating sites.  Match.com’s subscribers (paid members) now number 1.3 million, up by 1/3 over the past two years.  How? Match has been reaching out to singles over 50 and divorcees, pitching itself as a destination for mainstream daters who want serious relationships.  Yowzah!  Is that what we want to hear or what???

Here’s more:

At Match, 23 percent of subscribers are over 50, more than double the number two years ago. Yahoo Personals has seen double-digit growth in the number of users over 50 in the past two years, thanks in part to a new service that provides extra control, privacy, and security. EHarmony’s fastest-growing age group last year was the over-50 segment.

Here’s something you rarely see: the number of paid subscribers to Match.com (1.3 million) and the number of “registered users” (15 million—total of PAID and UNPAID users), in the same article.  These figures are rarely paired together, because of what I call “Online Dating’s Dirty Little Secret”—by far the largest percentage of folks with their profiles on dating sites are unpaid, and therefore not able to answer your email without paying up first.  That’s more that 11 to 1, paid to unpaid, on Match.com.  That means for every 11+ first emails you send out, you should only expect to get 1 back!  Why is this so?  Read my earlier posting to find out.

Here’s a bit that I found interesting but confusing:

The site is also branching out to daters desiring privacy, like executives or teachers reluctant to post their pictures online where subordinates or students may find them. It has introduced Chemistry.com, a premium service that shows a subscriber’s profile only to those candidates deemed suitable by a personality test developed by an anthropologist.

I’ve had a number of clients who are professionals in their community and really worry that their clients will see and recognize them.  Some way for them to take advantage of online dating and protect their privacy would be great, but I don’t think Chemistry.com is going to do it.  Chemistry.com has dud written all over it.  The best part of Chemistry.com is it’s name.  I have heard no good buzz at all.  A commentator on Mark Brooks’ Online Personal Watch listed fiascos for 2007, and Chemistry.com is fifth on this list.

I love Match.com.  It’s where I met my Sweetie Drew in 1998.  But it’s not perfect.  And worst of all, it ignores ME!  A successful Romance Coach who met her now-husband right there!  The epitomy of dumbness, wouldn’t you think?  Now, Yahoo! Personals knows a good thing when they see it.  I got RECRUITED to write for Yahoo! Personals.  Wake up, Match,com!

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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An Online Dating Wedding

My friend Meg drove to Louisiana last weekend for the wedding of
her guy friend Shef.  Why is that of interest to you?  Well,
because Shef met his bride on eHarmony during 2006. Come to find
out (via Meg), Shef’s new sister-in-law met her spouse online
too.

I don’t know all the details, since I haven’t seen Shef since he
fell in love—he’s been spending a lot of time on I-10 between
here and there.  But I do know that Shef is Of a Certain Age
(over 50), and apparently the two are going to conduct their
marriage long distance while her daughters finish high school.
Yea for them both, and my heartiest congratulations!

You know that I am all in favor of online romance.  And I
understand long distance ones, too.  Drew and I were 482 miles
apart, door to door, when we met.  Lucky for both of us, I could
move and did, or we would have been burning up the miles like
Shef and his Sweetie.

Online daters have gotten spoiled in a comparatively short time,
not wanting to travel at all for love.  But I wanted the best,
and he was an eight hour drive away.

Just two years ago, WeddingChannel.com’s survey found that “12%
of engaged or recently married couples met online.”  I was wowed
by that figure then. reported on January 4, 2007,
that a survey by WedAlert.com found that 20% of the respondents
met through the Internet.  Wow, WOW!


A year ago, eHarmony claimed slightly over 90 marriages a DAY.
I’m not crazy about eHarmony for a variety of reasons.  You can
read some of them on my blog (category: eHarmony):
But hey, you can’t quarrel with eHarmony’s success, and that they
have spent the money to track it.

Internet dating is HOT!  And this is the best time EVER to get
online and look for love.  Remember, memberships on dating sites
go up around 30% between now and Valentine’s day.  That means new
faces, maybe one of them your future spouse.  Get on and get
looking!

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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No Good Ones On Dating Sites? Think Again…

Well, it does make a difference what you think of politicians.  Rep. Steve Rothman, U. S. Congressman from New Jersey, met his now-wife Jennifer Anne Beckenstein on Jdate.com.  See their photo here.  And it’s a nice story, so read it.

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

P. S.  Rothman is 53, Beckenstein 48.

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Eons Gets More Press

Eons, the new social networking site for the over 50 crowd got a recently—serious treatment.  (I mentioned Eons in an earlier blog posting.)  If you are over 50 and have been feeling left out of the MySpace rage, take a look at Eons.  It may be just what you are looking for.

Best, Kathryn Lord
Your Romance Coach

Psst, Eons:  Why haven’t you contacted me yet to be your site’s Romance Coach?  It’s a sure match.  Get in touch!

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We Love Love Stories September 23

From The Freeman, September 23:

WAUKESHA - Three weeks after posting his first online personal ad, a Menomonee Falls octogenarian with the handle “Silverdaddy” had 77 responses from female swooners.

Five month later, one of the women he contacted online - “Horselover,” 70, of Kentucky - became his wife.

Dix “Silverdaddy” Harper and his “Horselover” wife, Harriet, were both looking for a fresh approach to relationships later in life and found each other in a 21st century twist on a classic tale of love. Exchanging their first e-mails in April 2005, the couple will celebrate their first wedding anniversary Friday, joining the upswing of senior citizens turning to the Internet to find companionship, old friends and sometimes true love.

“It’s a Cinderella story,” Harriet Harper said.

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Today Show Covers Dating in Later Life

Hop on over to the Today Show Site and see two segments about dating for older folks.  Meredith Viera interviews , one of my favorite authors, and Dennie Hughes (who I haven’t heard of before).  Then Al Roker talks to and Cosmo editor Kate White about what men want in women.  While I have never heard of Zinczenko either, he seems to have a more realistic view of guys than the Cosmo editor.

The best thing about following the Today Show link is that you can actually watch the segments as they appeared on the show: Just click “Launch” under the photo on the right.  And bonus: there’s a great story about an older couple who met on Match.com.

From your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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Eons.com and the Movies

I’m still waiting to see “The Boynton Beach Club.”  Here’s a description of it.  Tallahassee does well in getting out-of-the-mainstream movies, but the BBC hasn’t made it here yet.  Anybody seen it that can post a review?

(Now, beyond my obvious interest in romance and folks over 60 [Dyan Cannon is over 60??!!], Boynton is my family name, and my parents came to Florida the first time when the arrange a house exchange in Boynton Beach.  I first got introduced to Florida visiting them.  Very nice to come to Florida from Maine in February.  So if it wasn’t for Boynton Beach, I wouldn’t be in Florida.)

Another tidbit for the Baby Boomer crowd: A new social networking website has gotten going that is sort of like My Space for the gray haired set: Eons.com.  I took a look at it, and was impressed.  Obviously, the site is just getting going, but has good potential. 

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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About.com Takes on Online Dating for Seniors

Here’s a great Q & A on About.com about online dating and seniors, so good that I posted a comment.  Here are my words below:

This link to “Is Online Dating Right for You?” gives a great positive overview of the wonderful resource that Internet dating has provided for singles of all ages, but for seniors in particular.  Where are all the nice older men (and women)?  Online and looking!

I am a Romance Coach working mostly with singles over 50. Internet dating is THE best resource, and best of all, online, it is okay for women to make the first move.  Men LIKE it.

I would also add that singles should be prepared to devote plenty of time to their search.  We often wish that finding romance should be easy and “just happen,” but we should expect that the older and more certain of ourselves that we become, the fewer the “right” partners there will be. 

Please visit my website at https://Find-a-Sweetheart.com and feel free to brouse the copious information there.  And subscribe to my free email newsletter *eMAIL to eMATE*

Best, Kathryn Lord
Your Romance Coach

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Low Income and Dating Potential

I get letters from visitors to my website and readers of my enewsletter all the time.  When I think that the questions posed are of interest to more than the writer, I often alter the writer’s note to conceal identifying details, then publish the relevant content here or in my free *eMAIL to eMATE* enewsletter. (Not a subscriber? Sign up here!)

Dear Kathryn,
I am a very proud. divorced Hispanic artist and have been told that am as handsome as a movie star. I have also been told that I am above average in intelligence, yet I keep being turned down for dates. Like most artists, I do not earn much money and I would like to know how I can convince some ladies that I am a good catch despite my lack of much money? Like most people, I hate rejection.  Any suggestions?

Jose


Well, Jose, you pose a difficult question.  I don’t know how old you are, but the older a man gets, the more women will look at financial accomplishments as part of a total package.  Of course, men look at women’s finances too.  Only smart on both parts.  Pride and good looks lose their luster with age, when women start looking to other qualities.

Finding a partner can be compared to striking a bargain like buying a car.  What do you have to offer in the deal?  The more that you have to offer, the better deal that you can strike.  I suggest that you look to increasing your worth as much as possible, and I don’t mean just money.  Kindness, generosity, dependability, humility, good character all might be qualities for you to work on that would increase your appeal to women.  You also might want to take a look at my two articles on rejection: and

Good luck to you.  Kathryn

Dear Kathryn,

I read with interest your comment on my previous query. I am in my mid 50s but feel 20 years younger and have been trying to date women aged less than 40. I am puzzled about your explanation about money. I am not flat broke but will not own a car for personal reasons and I detest ostentatious displays of wealth. If money can buy love, how come so many poor people love each other?  As for the other precious characteristics you mentioned, I possess them all but no one seems to be willing to give me a chance to show them. I interpret rejection as a signal that “you are not a nice person.” My response to this is “if you can judge me without knowing much about me, you are not a nice person.” Are there any nice girls left?


Dear Jose,
Now you include another clue for why you are getting rejected: If you are in your mid 50’s and approaching women under 40, your rejection level is going to be high.  Why would a woman that age want a man in his 50’s who is not well established financially?  Again, you need to get more realistic about what you have to offer and look for women who are more likely to accept what you have—women your age, for instance.

Best, Kathryn

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SeniorFriendFinder Review

A healthy proportion of my clients are over 50, and they often ask me about SeniorFriendFinder.com  I have had conflicting reports from folks who have tried it out.  One woman loved the site, but more have at least mixed results, and several downright bad.  Even the woman who loved the site said that there seemed to be many married men cruising around and looking for sex.  She took sword in hand and put a sentence in her profile that told married men to keep moving.  That helped.

I suspect that the problem with SeniorFriendFinder is that it is part of the family of the edgy FriendFinder dating sites, AdultFriendFinder.com the most notorious.  If you want jaunt through pure raunch, go take a look, but be prepared for slime.

Here’s a largely positive review of SeniorFriendFinder.com, FYI.  I almost always recommend the Big Two, Match.com and , regardless of the age of my clients.  They consistently perform, and have less of the sexy intrusion of AdultFriendFinder and others.

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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Stats About Baby Boomers

Here’s an interesting set of stats from Match.com about Baby Boomers that “Flying Solo” columnists Jan L. Warner and Jan Collins mentioned recently:

_70 percent of their boomer members are divorced or widowed;

_More than half of the boomers using their site exercise, and their favorite activities are walking, hiking, dancing, swimming, bowling, and golf.

_The boomers like the finer things in life: 39 percent enjoy dining out, 34 percent like to travel, 24 percent go to museums, 20 percent attend performing arts events, and 19 percent attend wine-tastings.

_Boomers say intelligence is the most important personality attribute in potential partners, followed closely by fidelity, confidence, and humor.

_Those boomers who have not retired are most likely to be self-employed entrepreneurs, followed by executives and physicians. Boomers using the site also have higher incomes than the average member (22 percent of the boomers earn $50,000 to $100,000 annually).

_38 percent are empty nesters.

_47 percent have a bachelor’s degree, while 15 percent have a graduate degree.

_Baby boomers’ biggest turn-off is sarcasm.

_Boomers are the least likely to believe they have only one soul mate.

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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72 But Feeling 60

I get letters from visitors to my website and readers of my enewsletter all the time.  When I think that the questions posed are of interest to more than the writer, I often alter the writer’s note to conceal identifying details, then publish the relevant content here or in my free *eMAIL to eMATE* enewsletter. (Not a subscriber? Sign up here!)

Dear Kathryn -

How much does Romance Coaching cost?  I live on Social Security
only…a very small limited income.  Money is very scarce.  And
what’s the chance of finding love at 72 when I feel 60, and am
not attracted to men my age?  Thanks, Betty

Hey Betty—

Probably, individual coaching would be out of your price range.
I charge $75 per half hour on the phone, with unlimited email
support in between.  I’d suggest that you take advantage of my
lower cost options.  There’s tons of free information on my
website.  I’m doing one of my “Talk to Your Romance Coach for
FREE!” hours on July 12.  It’ll be on the phone with whoever
signs up and calls in.  These hours are always lively and
informative.

I offer regular workshops (listed on my website) for far less
than individual coaching.  My book “Find a Sweetheart Soon!” is
only about $30 and does a thorough job getting you ready for a
mate search.

A single’s financial status will be important to your potential mate. 
And dating costs money. You might want to think about ways to
supplement your income.  Since you feel 60, you may very well
have some good money-making opportunities that would get you
out and about, and also give you some extra money to spend on
dating related activities.

As far as your chances of finding love, everything that you can
do to increase the possibilities helps your chances.  Internet
dating is a fantastic resource.  Keep in mind that there are men
your age that feel and look 60, too.  Widen your parameters on
who would be possible mates.  Watch your critical thinking and
start noticing what you do want, rather than what you don’t.  The
route most likely to fail: Do nothing.

Best of luck, Kathryn

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Dependable?

I can’t believe a commercial I just saw on TV.  It was one of those mushy ones of women looking for wedding dresses, then a shot of the bride and groom in front of their guests, when come to find out, it was the older woman getting married, rather than the young ones who were her daughters.  “How nice, what a terrific twist on the wedding theme,” I thought, until the product being plugged came up:  Depends.  Adult diapers.  Can you imagine?  Using a wedding of an older couple to advertise diapers.  Really.  That’s a stretch.  I wonder if she told him before the ceremony?

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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Newsweek Eats Its Words

Do you remember where you were around the first of June 20 years
ago?  While not etched in my memory as firmly as when JFK was
shot (I was in ninth grade gym class) or when the Twin Towers got
hit (I was watching “Good Morning America” and husband Drew was
in a plane heading for Washington, D. C.), I know that I was
single, trying yet again to figure out the dating scene, and
living on an island in Maine where the pickings were pretty slim.

Twenty years ago from this past June 5, Newsweek published it’s
famous/infamous cover story called “The Marriage Crunch: If
You’re a Single Woman, Here Are Your Chances of Getting Married,”
illustrated in a glaring red, white, and blue graph that look
like the ski jump the unfortunate guy crashed off in the old
“Wide World of Sports” intro.  The story’s most memorable line,
branded into every woman’s memory to this day, was that a 40 year
old single woman was “more likely to get killed by a terrorist”
than to ever marry.

I had been reading Newsweek faithfully since high school, and
figured “If Newsweek says so, it must be true.”  But GHADS!  What
a horribly depressing message.  While I wasn’t quite 40 yet and
had already been married once, this news felt like the marital
kiss of death.

Well, it has taken 20 years, but Newsweek has finally eaten it’s
words.  The June 5, 2006 issue’s cover story re-looks at the
original article, and admits “Why we were wrong.”  Seems like in
general, Newsweek was reporting on a study that used past models
to predict the future, and they were wrong.  Read the whole Newsweek article here.

Here are three pieces of info I found most interesting:

1.  At least 90% of Baby Boomers have married or will marry.

2.  Fourteen single women were profiled in the first article 20
years ago.  Newsweek went back and found 11 of the 14.  Eight of
those 11 women had subsequently married, AND (drum roll please)
have had no divorces.

3.  The infamous line about a 40 year old single woman “more
likely to get killed by a terrorist” than to marry was a throw-
away line that the editors thought was so clearly over the top
that everyone would get it was a joke.  Well, we didn’t.

So if you are over 40 and still single, rejoice!  Newsweek was
wrong, your odds of getting married if you want to are getting
better all the time, and the chances are you won’t get killed by
anyone, let alone a terrorist.

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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We Love Love Stories, Senior Set

Another Match.com success story: Kay Rudderow (66) and Charley
Myers (71) on Match in 2004.  They are getting married on May 21.
Read their story here!

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“How optimistic is that? Part 2

Just a little over a year ago, my 81 year old mother (she’s now 82) got married for the second time.  She and her new husband George (86) rented a cottage on the beach for their honeymoon, and had such a nice time that they made reservations for the following year to celebrate their first anniversary.  They just got back from honeymoon #2, again had a wonderful time, and reserved the cabin for next year!

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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Has Anyone Seen “Boynton Beach Club”?

Just saw a review for what looks like a fun movie about romance for the over 50 crowd. I haven’t seen it yet. Has anyone out there caught it? Let’s hear some comments…

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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More Good News for the Pre-Boomers

Deborah Carr, a Rutgers sociologist, reported that “Romantic Relationships among the elderly (over 65) are on the rise simply because the Internet has made it easier for older singles to meet.  In the article “Online dating helps many find love at any age” from The Grand Rapids Press, we meet Gloria Bursey Slykhouse (she admits to being over 65) and Harry Borgman (77) who are “keeping company” in such exotic places as Puerto Vallerta, Mexico.  Slykhouse found Borgman’s profile on Yahoo! Personals.

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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My Letter to the Editor of Newsweek

Since I am a Romance Coach specializing in helping singles find partners using Internet dating sites, I read with interest Vanessa Juarez’s articlewww.findlovehere.com” in the February 20th issue.

The first half of the article is essentially correct, but falters in the second half when Juarez starts talking about specific dating sites. First off, folks 50 and over, divorced or not, find the best and most choices on the largest Internet dating sites, Match.com (where I met my husband in 1998) and Yahoo! Personals. Smaller sites have correspondingly smaller numbers.

What Juarez did not mention is that sites like PerfectMatch and eHarmony (which have built-in a more passive role for singles—the web site does the matching—and therefore appeal to women) have very skewed gender ratios that do not favor women. PerfectMatch openly courts men, enticing them with 2:1 male to female ratios. That would include all age ranges, so likely the older women get (when they outnumber men anyway), the worse the ratios.

Most of my clients are women over 40, and I NEVER suggest either eHarmony or PerfectMatch for these because of those bad numbers. All have gone to either Match.com or Yahoo! Personals or both and been pleased and astounded at the large numbers of quality men just waiting to hear from them. Internet dating is in large part a numbers game, and a single is best served by going to the sites where the numbers are in his or her favor— large numbers of singles in gender ratios that favor the individual.

Best, Kathryn Lord

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We Love Love Stories—The Silver Set

If you want to read, step by step, how a nurse in Pennsylvania and a soft-hearted man in North Dakota met through eHarmony and then built a romance and relationship, this is the story for you. Reporter Carla Kelly charts the course meticulously in the Times Record.

Then, one of my favorite dating columnists Tom Blake wrote about about 50 something’s Mike and Carolyn. Mike, completely out of character, wrote Blake about his equally out-of-character romance—fast and long distance. Want different results??? Do something different!!!

And both of these couples span the miles—don’t be afraid to search folks who live farther than 5 miles from your doorstep, even if you don’t want to move.  Maybe Mr. or Ms. Right will move to you!

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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Stats About Singles 45 and Older

Of the 97 million Americans 45 and older, almost 40% are single (from U. S. Census figures).

Membership at Match.com of people 50 and over has grown 340% since 2000.

Visitors 55 and over to Yahoo! Personals went from 767,000 (July 2004) to 1,072,000 (July 2005)—From Nielsen/NetRatings.

A little over 1/3 of women over 50 who are dating are dating younger men. (AARP)

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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A First Person Report On The Senior Bachelor

I’ve gotten a lot of traffic to my blog because of postings I did months ago ( (4/24, 4/29, 4/29, and 5/9) about Richard Roe, the Senior Bachelor. And guess what? One of the women who got to a face to face meeting/screening with Roe wrote a first-hand report. Here it is:

Kathryn,

I would love for the hundreds of women that Richard Roe has taken pictures of to know that now the photos are on the web for other men to look at. We all knew and signed papers, but never did anyone of us think he was such a cad that he would start his web page on senior dating before he even picked the one he wanted.

This whole thing was about money and is a surprise to me at least.

I did meet Richard Roe and did have my twenty minute meeting with him. HE IS A CAD. Now he wants to meet with twelve women and then pick six to take on a trip, one month each. What happen to finding the one? Also, he has already invited someone that had something to do with Pop and Me to be on part of the trip. Like I was, these women are so wrapped up in the dream he is promising that they don’t see anything else.

Roe will not let you write on his blog if you do not identify yourself. There were people on that were telling how it really is and he would delete them as soon as he found them. The whole thing has been a scam from day one. He changed the rules every time we would turn around. Now you have to be God, which was never said before.

I just had this gut feeling when I meet him that he had a different agenda.

Miranda

Doesn’t surprise me at all. I’ve had my doubts from the start.

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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Yahoo! Personals Singles Survey

Yahoo! Personals also noted National Singles Week by releasing their , the third annual one Yahoo! has done. Here are some tidbits:

The number of mature singles using e-mail to flirt continues to grow with 68 percent of respondents 56-years of age and older ranking e-mail as the most common online approach to flirting.

More than half of men (51 percent) and women (56 percent) say it is acceptable for a potential date to be up to ten years younger. One in five male respondents would date someone 20 years their junior. Women weren’t as open to the significant difference in age: less than ten percent of women would date someone 20 years their junior. And on a surprising note, 52 percent of men would date someone up to ten years their senior.

Consistent with previous years, the 2005 Yahoo! Personals Singles’ Voice Survey found the majority of online daters are “single but seriously looking” (80 percent) versus being focused on “just dating.”

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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Richard Roe The SeniorBachelor Is Still At It

Evidently, “Oprah” reran the episode with Richard Roe (the SeniorBachelor.com guy who is looking for a woman to travel the world with) in August, because since then, my blog has seen a lot of extra traffic from all over the world because of Google searches on his name. See my earlier postings on Richard Roe’s endeavors. April 27, April 29 Part 1, April 29 Part 2, and May 9 I wrote this last entry after watching “Pop and Me,” the movie Roe’s son made about their trip around the world. It (the film AND what I wrote) are revealing.

I decided to go on over to SeniorBachelor.com to see how Richard’s search is shaping up. Oooeee! It’s more of the egotism I wrote about earlier. Check out his blog, particularly the entry for September 4, and see him living out the bachelor dream. Ya gotta hand it to the guy: He’s got a great line going.

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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SeniorFriendFinder Membership Jumps

SeniorFriendFinder.com reports that their membership has increased 476% since June 2001. Most dating sites had a big jump in membership after 9/11, when many singles suddenly realized their desire for family and permanence. SeniorFriendFinder does not restrict members by age, but most are in their 50’s, 60’s or 70’s. I’ve heard a variety of reports from clients and readers about SeniorFriendFinder, good and not so good. I’d love to hear from you if you have tried this site.

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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Seniors Flocking to Online Dating

Did you know that Seniors comprise the fastest growing group of cyberdaters? About a million Americans 65 and older are now looking online for a date.

And dating sites love those folks who are over 55: A CBS News article quotes Ron Geraci of AARP—“Sites are quickly embracing the 55-plus category because A) There are so many of them, and B) They pay their bills.” Match.com says their senior membership has tripled in the last five years.

Match.com’s Shawn Henderson says: “In the seniors, they’re a lot more honest about their shape, their size, what they are interested in.”

Looks good to me!

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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Online Dating for Seniors, via Jim Miller “The Savvy Senior”

I just came across this article, and it is so good that I am copying it in it’s entirety.

Millions of Seniors Use Online Dating Services

Dear Savvy Senior: Do you know much about senior dating services on the Internet? My two daughters have been urging me to try it, but I have some concerns. I am 59 years old, have been divorced for nine years and would like to meet some interesting new men, but the Internet seems a little strange. What can you tell me? - Single Senior

Dear Single: Online dating has become wildly popular among the Boomer and senior populations over the past few years. In fact, more than 16 percent of those active on the top-five dating sites are over age 55, and more than 5 percent are over age 65. Here’s what you should know:

Online dating: Not since high school or college will you find such a large number of potential dates and mates in one place. If you’re interested in dating again or, are just looking for a friend to spend time with, and have access to the Internet, online dating services can be a nice option. Here are some things to know.

* Convenience: You can meet hundreds of single people that tickle your fancy without ever leaving your home. Also, by exchanging e- mail you get to know each other slowly, without the awkwardness that comes with first dates. Most sites also offer instant messaging and chat rooms.

* Costs: Most online dating services allow you to create your own personal profile, post photos and search for compatible members for free. But, when you’re ready to start contacting people, you’ll have to become a member, which typically costs between $20 and $50 per month.

* Safety: When you sign up with a dating or matchmaking service, you remain anonymous. No one should ever get access to your full name, address, phone number or e-mail address until you decide to give it out at your own discretion. Be very prudent with giving out your personal information!

* Informative: Most sites offer personality profiles of their members that include things like photos, hobbies, interests, family history, political beliefs, dreams, goals and favorite activities so you can get to know members online before you decide whether or not you’d like to meet.

* Pictures Can Lie: Unfortunately, some people post photos that were taken many years ago, or that are extremely flattering and not very true-to-life. If you remember that they probably won’t look as good as their photo, you won’t be as disappointed.

* People Can Lie: In an effort to get more responses, or in some cases to deliberately mislead, some people lie in their profiles, so don’t believe everything you read. If they sound too good to be true, they probably are.

Senior dating sites
More and more online dating sites are recognizing the growing number of single Boomers and seniors who would love to find love and friendship with a suitable partner. Here are some top sites that specialize in senior matchmaking.
* SilverSingles.com: Owned by MatchNet, this is a great senior dating Web site with more than 8 million members worldwide.
* eHarmony.com: With more than 6 million users, eHarmony has been courting older singles by teaming up with ThirdAge (a Web site for Boomers) and attending last year’s AARP convention.
* SeniorFriendFinder.com: A senior dating site and part of the FriendFinder network. It draws upon a database of more than 2 million members.
* PrimeSingles.net: This site says it is for single men and women 40 and up, but the age group tends to be more in their late 50s and 60s.
* Match.com: While they don’t offer any special services just for seniors, Match.com is the world’s largest online dating service (for people of all ages), with more than 15 million members, many of whom are over age 55.

Send your senior questions to: Savvy Senior, P.O. Box 5443, Norman, OK 73070, or visit http://www.savvysenior.org. Jim Miller is a regular contributor to NBC’s “Today” show and author of “The Savvy Senior” book.

Source: Charleston Gazette, The

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From the “It’s Never Too Late” Department

Here’s a great article about two lovely folks (picture included!), 81 and 82, who met online a year ago. Not only did they meet online, but also, one lives in Florida and the other in Indiana! They’ve visited back and forth (in real time and space, flying to the other’s location) four times. Yippee!

Here’s the lessons: You are never too old to find love. Even folks in their 80’s can master computers and the Internet and use the technology. And don’t limit yourself geographically—cars cover miles, and so do airplanes. Are you willing to go without love rather than put yourself out to travel a bit? That’s the risk you take with every limit you place on your search.

From Your Romance Coach, Kathryn Lord

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